There’s something magical about these McKinsey webinars. It feels like they’ve opened a window from their pristine offices and allowed us to peek out — just for a moment — to see how the top of the world lives. Finally, I got a taste of what pure oxygen must feel like.
The show lasted a full 60 minutes, and McKinsey clearly tried to push the boat out. They know how to seduce an audience.
I’ll admit, I wasn’t 100% attentive — I was cooking (again) and eating (again) — but from what I gathered, to make a long story short, everything in trade and business Disneyland is fine. We can all go back to sleep. Nothing to worry about, folks.
Metaphorically speaking, the McKinsey fairy tale was a masterpiece. They dressed impeccably for the occasion, chose a fine restaurant, brought gifts and flowers, wore their best perfume, recited a few lines of poetry, hired a small band, sang a tune, presented a diamond ring, served the best food and the most expensive wines, even brought strawberry-flavoured condoms and chocolate-flavoured lube. It was all set to be a great evening — until they spoiled it.
First, McKinsey tried to spike our drinks by telling us that Europe is still a major player in the global business food chain. Come on, McKinsey… what kind of nonsense is that? We’re not that naïve.
Then came the HSBC guy — and I’m almost sure he slipped in a little McKinsey-style product placement. I quote: “At HSBC, we can help you…”. That’s not insight, my friend — that’s advertising.
Next up was the university professor. He said something about “blah blah… subsidise… blah blah…”
Hold on, buddy. Not that kind of language here. In Europe, we’ve already been subsidised into poverty. You can’t use that word here — it’s offensive.
Because here, “subsidise” means: take money from the middle class and give it to McKinsey’s clients.
McKinsey, if I hear that word one more time in your webinars, I swear I’ll have you called to a Congressional hearing.
Then came the Q&A, but I didn’t get the chance to ask my question. Here it is:
Metaphorically speaking — if the Chinese own the airline and the Americans are the pilots — who are the Europeans? The stewards? The baggage handlers?
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